kindle ´ Halfway to the Grave ß Jeaniene Frost
Her convinced that being half dead doesn’t have to be all bad But before she can enjoy her status as kick ass demon hunter Cat and Bones are pursued by a group of killers Now Cat will have to choose a side and Bones is turning out to be as tempting as any man with a heartbea 2718 ON SALE for 299 starsGAH So here's the deal NIGHT HUNTRESS by Jeaniene Frost is one of the first UF series I ever read so it holds a special place in my heartThat being said there are aspects that haven't aged well At all Things that were cornball the first time I read them in 2007 are borderline stoopid in 2015 Things like “I thawt I thaw a putty tat” Okay that was always stoopid How 'bout this “Tell me why you registered for college?” I asked in amusement She nodded pointedly at an attractive male who passed by us “The boys This place is crawling with them It’s like an all you can eat buffet” UghBUT Bones is one of the most perfect love interests ever conceived In fact if he wasn't a vampire not my favorite he'd be a strong contender for Numero Uno Book Boyfriend currently held by Clayton Danvers of Women of the Otherworld fameHe's a Bad Boy A killer for hire with just a touch of vulgarity that makes him intriguing rather than crass Or maybe it's that his rough edges are acceptable bc he's also daring without being reckless loyal and oh so patient with his temperamental CatBeing a bit temperamental myself I appreciate that He's also dead HA sexyBUTAnd I'm probably digging my own grave here PUNS I has 'em but he's also very obviously modeled after Spike As in James Marsters from BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER You What's wrong with that?Me Well You glowers menacinglyMe HIS HEAD IS TOO BIGIt really is And it widens oddly at his forehead Almost like he's some Mad Scientist Super Villain I want to like him really I do And sometimes it's almost possible But then there's thisSO This reread I was on a mission I was determined to find a suitable alternative for Bones in my head And I did Behold Justin TherouxI was horribly disappointed to discover that he's only 5'9 BUT that's the awesome thing about Bones in my head I can stretch him to the 6'2 he's meant to be preserving the aspect ratio of course and VOILÀ Perfection takes a bow congratulates selfCatherine Crawfield is one of a kind She's grown up knowing she was different but any attempts to discuss her extras with her mother are met with anger and shame So she does her best to hide her strangeness Pretends to be normal Until finally on her sixteenth birthday her mother tells her the truth Catherine's father was a vampire who raped her Five months later Cat was born premature but fully developed To illustrate the point Mommy Dearest stabbed her in the thigh to make her eyes glow Just like her father'sThe MonsterCatherine must be careful you see She has evil inside her and it wants out Cat's mom kind of a bitch After that Cat makes it her mission to hunt and kill creatures like her father Now she's twenty two and she's refined her techniue learned through trial and error the best ways to beguile then dispatch her prey But one night things don't go as planned Her target isn't falling for her usual lines and in the inevitable confrontation he gets the drop on her and after being knocked unconscious she wakes chained to a wall in a cave Not goodThat's when things get really interestingSuffice it to say that they Cat and Bones form an unwilling alliance and thus begins Cat's education about reality vs what she's been told And this is where another of the Big Problems rears its ugly head the slut shaming Given what you already know about Mommy Dearest it shouldn't come as a surprise that Cat's formative years included a rather narrow minded Christian perspective on dating and relationships So it's understandable that she has a hard time with her world being turned upside down what with learning that vampires aren't any evil than humans and that sex is part of a healthy adult relationshipBUT that doesn't make her self flagellation any easier to read The only thing I can say is that it's a realistic part of her character development not a long running theme Those are my only real complaints the corn and the shame I acknowledge that the whole Spike thing is completely superficial and subject to individual preference And despite those issues HALFWAY TO THE GRAVE by Jeaniene Frost was still an entertaining read The plot was interesting enough to hold my attention in the face of awful turns of phrase and sporadic bouts of self loathing It's pretty funny too And Bones than makes up for any early deficiencies in Cat's character Overall far from a perfect first installment but worth continuing Recommended
Jeaniene Frost ß Halfway to the Grave text
Halfway to the GraveAn unlikely partnershipIn exchange for help finding her father Cat agrees to train with the sexy night stalker until her battle reflexes are as sharp as his fangs She’s amazed she doesn’t end up as his dinner – are there actually good vampires? Pretty soon Bones will have Welcome to the wonderful cliche world of vampires TBH I read this book for the funny title but it actually surprised me It had a great blend of supernatural and urban fantasy world building – sexy dark romantic witty action filled plot filled with fantastic characters So the plot deep raspy voice Its been years since Cat learned of her true despicable nature and hundreds of people have died Some by bad luck Others by pure stupidity I mean really why would you CHOSE to go to a club full of vampires? But that didn't bother the Cat none she only cared about one thing and one thing alone killing vampires Because in a game of life or death you either live or you die Our heroine Cat is a sexy strong ass woman who is half vampire who is determined to killwait for it other vampires “I'm saying that I'm a moody insecure narrow minded jealous borderline homicidal bitch and I want you to promise me that you're okay with that because it's who I am and you're what I need” She is brutally honest with herself about her homicidal tendencies but tends to block out any other feelings she may but insists she doesn't haveat least till the last possible second of denial “Life sucks and then you die” Her can do attitude was honestly just so overwhelmingly optimistic at timessarcasm but it was pretty hilarious seeing her perspective as she encounters some crazy shit “Sonofabitch” I shouted Great that was going to leave a mark There’d be a bruise the size of my stupidity” It's always refreshing when both you and the character are reviewing their actions screaming YOU STUPID BiTcH wHyyyyy?? Hehe She was an entertaining character and I chuckled a couple times Basically she the bloody Kate Daniels of the vampire world and I loved that While she did have a littlespecial snowflake going on her strength was also a weakness which created a nice balance between kicking ass and learning how mortal she is “My eyes narrowed as I considered my options One Put a stake through his heart Appealing but morally incorrect” We've all had that one bad ex but Cat's ex might actually take the cake He was a total douche but it did help ground her character a little bit with some history plus his worth to her is hilariously overestimated We all know that special moment when you meet your next possible love the dramatic music playing in your head how you always say the right words and of course wearing your best outfit Cat's moment was a tad different You were so nervous you kept blushing Never had someone try to stake me who blushed so much” Meet Bones sexy ancient vampirewho kills other vampiresand has a British accent Because ya gotta have something to differentiate him from the othersi'm embarrassed to say it totally worked TEAM BONES AND CAT ALL THE WAY BACKOFF HATERS “Are you telling me bloody caramel apples and books taught you how to kill vampires? Is that what you’re saying? Well good thing most of the recent generations are nearly illiterate or we’d all be in serious trouble Blimey” These two had some great banter back and forth in between all the blood and gore and fighting I couldn't help but fall in love with these two characters Thank gawd there was no insta love It took a while for them to tolerate let alone trust each other “Lucifer’s bouncing balls Kitten not again Uh oh I suirmed instinctively also trying to block Tony’s body from his view As if that made him any less dead” I wish there had been a little scenes like this focused on the comedy and working together Would it be that bad to have little character building and snark in between the death death and death? There comes a time in every reader's life where the repetition of action sex supernatural becomes dull I know I know blasphemy After several attempts and almost killing each other the two fell in love “I love you”My mouth fell open and my mind briefly cleared of thought Then I found my voice“No you don’t”He let out a snort and dropped his hand “You know pet that is one truly annoying habit you have telling me what I do and do not feel” But whats worse than admitting you have feelings for a dude? Admitting them to your mother Kitten you still haven’t told her? Blimey what are you waiting for?”“The Second Coming of Christ” I snapped “And not a moment sooner Here in the closet” The mother can fall in a hole and die for all i care No commentsNow for the only secondary character I actually gave a shit about Timmie I loved Timmie he was so cute and college struggleshonestly I relate “I’m sorry” he choked making it worse by trying to talk More coffee emerged spraying me in the face His eyes bugged in horror but I laughed so hard at seeing him leak like a thermos with holes that I started to hiccup” I really regret him not having of an involvement I thought for certain he would've gotten caught up in the action It just felt like this book's character development was limited to Cat her love interest and whatever bad guys she came across Timmie was also the guy that pointed out the obvious to Cat and basically beat the sense into Cat when she started getting too i want to but i shouldn't Aaaaa men suck But after his three scenes to help Cat he faded away RIP Timmie screentimeMy biggest complaint is the ending I HATE with a BURNING passion the view spoiler I have to leave you so you'll be safe but see ya in the next 7 books hide spoiler